Seraphina
by Oiche
Summary: Sam did the unthinkable but maybe he could be forgiven and helped to find his way...
1. Chapter 1

Sam blinked slowly as he watched Dean get into the car. He wasn't shocked. He deserved what Dean had said, and much worse. In a way he'd have felt better if Dean had really bailed him out. He could handle screaming, maybe a punch or two; but Dean's calm acknowledgement that the damage between them was so real, so irreversible was unbearable.

He wasn't shocked but he was somewhat surprised. Hearing Dean actually say that his trust in Sam was gone…that was hard.

Sam swallowed roughly and looked at his feet, gearing himself up to get into the car calmly. He willed the gathering tears away. His soul was in torment, of course! He'd brought about the apocalypse! People were dying and it was all his fault. He deserved whatever punishment came his way, he really did but he had hoped against all odds, that Dean might still be fighting his corner.

He stepped, moving to the car, he had to get himself together and try to do something to fix what he had started. As he approached the rear of the vehicle, light that was white and piercing flashed before his eyes. When he could see again he was still in the parking lot. Sam was confused, that light meant angels or change of location but he saw neither. He turned around, scanning the hospital parking area for Castiel or one of the others.

"Hello."

Sam jumped and spun back to face the car. A girl, around nineteen, stood at the back of the car. Her hair floated about her in long honeyed waves, she wore a long white dress with thin straps, her creamy chest, neck and arms free to the cool night air. She was petite, far shorter than him, but long-limbed and wiry. Her face was made up of big, long-lashed brown doe-eyes and perfect lips. A sprinkling of freckles finished the look. Basically, she was the quintessential, Hollywood angel. Beautiful and perfect in an ethereal and untouchable way.

"Lemme guess," Sam said with a frown of displeasure "Another angel."

"Nope," she said in soft but firm voice "A gift."

"A gift?" Sam repeated incredulously.

"Yes, a gift." She nodded and moved closer to Sam, circling him as she spoke. "From God to you."

"God?" Sam said, incredulity now being far too mild a word.

"Yes."

"You really expect me to believe this?" Sam strode past her angrily, towards the car. He peered inside to alert Dean to their strange visitor but he was frozen, mid-sneeze.

"I do."

He turned back to face her and raised a brow. "You practise that in the mirror, don't you?" she said.

Sam frowned, "Explain, now."

"Well, it just looks way too smooth to be natural and…"

"Not that!" he huffed in annoyance. "What is this gift? And why would He give it to me? Aren't I in his bad books?"

"I'm the gift," she told him, nonchalantly.

"You?" Sam stared in shock, "God gave me a girl?"

"Yes, not a human girl, but yes."

"If you're not human, what are you then? You said that you're not an angel."

"I'm kind of like an angel but this body is my own. God created me as a weapon to aid you and your brother."

Sam almost smiled, "So you're gonna help us fight Lucifer?"

"Yes, but not in the way you think. At least, not a first. He sent me to boost morale. See, right now Dean is disillusioned, weary. And you, you're so busy beating yourself up that neither of you are ready to fight this war."

"So what are you here to do?"

"I'm here to guide you, to help you."

Sam looked at the ground and thought of Ruby, "How do you expect me to trust you?"

Silence. When he looked up again, the girl stood before him. He watched as she stood on tip-toe and pressed a kiss, chaste and sweet, to his lips. With that kiss he felt all of her love and compassion and that of God. He knew in his heart that this was real.

Sam raised a shaking hand to his mouth as she stepped away, "Wh-what was that?"

"That was a message. Do you believe me now?"

"Y-yes."

"As to why God is helping you…" she continued with a beaming smile, "that is because He is forgiving. You got lost but He still loves you. Didn't you ever listen in church?"

"We weren't really big attenders."

Sam felt joy wash over him as she laughed at his response. She moved closer to him again and wrapped her arms around his surprised form. "I am here now, Samuel Winchester. Rest assured knowing that I am with you always and will be watching you both."

She stepped away again, "You can't tell Dean about this."

Sam looked as if he was about to object. "You have no choice in this and he will understand, Sam."

"When you need me, I'll be there." With those words she was gone and Sam heard Dean's sneeze end. Stunned and consumed by his thoughts, he got into the car.

Later Sam climbed tiredly into his cold bed in the motel he and Dean were currently residing in. The joy he'd felt earlier was as a distant memory. He wondered if it had been a delusion conjured by his troubled mind to protect him from his grim reality. Coldness radiated not only from the bed but from his brother, in the bed behind him a few feet away.

"Hey."

Sam lifted his head from the pillow and saw the girl from before. "Hey," he whispered in confusion.

"Scoot over," she said and Sam shuffled back on the bed in bafflement. "Good."

Sam watched her face light up in a smile as she climbed under the covers and tucked herself against his body. She draped and arm over his side and stroked his back soothingly. Her skin radiated warmth that seeped right to his soul. She rested her head against his chest and sighed contentedly.

"Rest," she whispered to him.

Sam felt his mind drifting towards sleep already, he hadn't fallen asleep so easily in what felt like decades. "Wait," he murmured groggily.

"Yes?" her soft voice whispered.

"Tell me your name."

"It's Seraphina."

"Serphina," he said, testing the sound on his tongue with a smile.


	2. Chapter 2

Sam stood frozen in the supermarket, staring at the knife in his hands. The blood that he wanted so badly dripped from the blade. It called out to him, taunting him with its closeness in proximity.

"Don't, Sam."

He looked to the left and Seraphina stood there, she stared with eyes that didn't judge only calmly encouraged. He couldn't let her down. She had given him reason to keep on fighting these last few days.

"Seraphina…"

"I know it's hard, my love," she said and walked closer, embracing him from behind.

She had called him 'my love'! Was he the only one who noticed that? "What are you doing?"

"Hm?" she murmured from where she was buried against his back.

"This can't be part of the job description."

She stepped back and let him go as Sam turned to face her. "It is," she told him, eyes large and earnest. "I am yours. It is my job to protect and comfort you."

"You make it sound like you're a prostitute."

Sam wished to take the words back right away, he saw the hurt reach her eyes and the surprise in her body-language. "I see," she said, "If you would like me to go about my duties differently, I can do so. I'm sorry if I overstepped my position."

She looked like she was going to leave. Sam grabbed her quickly and pulled her close to his chest. "I didn't mean…I'm sorry."

Seraphina was wonderful to embrace, he realised. She was both physically and emotionally warm and soft. She hugged Sam like he had never been hugged before. With Jess it had been similar, but not to this magnitude. Seraphina hugged with every particle of her being.

Suddenly, and far too soon, she let him go. Sam was horrified to see that the knife in his hands had stained crimson blood across the front of her, once, immaculate gown.

"Seraphina…"

She looked down at the stain and smiled at him, "Don't worry. It's not important. Standard issue."

She smiled jokingly at him. Then, her expression changed and became far more sombre. She reached out a hand and stroked the line of his jaw gently.

"Be strong."

And then she was gone. Sam stared at the knife he had smeared her with and contemplated it in horror. He was even more horrified that he still felt a pull towards the blood but his resolve against it was stronger now, he could stand it.


End file.
